The Stairly Bears (by Amanda Hyatt)
THE STAIRLY BEARS
In every multi-storeyed home
Across the globe, Beware!
Under the stairs there surely lives
A family of bears.
‘Cause bears live under the stairs, you know,
Yes, under the stairs are bears,
Behind the umbrella, beside the broom,
They rummaged around and made some room,
Yes, under the stairs are bears.
And Aunty Fi, she laughs at me,
And says ‘What nonsense! Bears, indeed!’
And Uncle Stu, he hasn’t a clue,
But I don’t care, I know it’s true
That under the stairs are bears.
And bears play under the stairs, you know,
Yes, under the stairs they play,
From hide and seek to Peek-a-boo,
Think leapfrog, tag – and skipping, too,
Yes, bears play under the stairs.
From What’s the Time Now, Mr Prowls?
To ‘Grizzly Says’ and Musical Growls,
Don’t open the door till after 3,
(They’d love a six-year-old for tea!),
Yes, bears play under the stairs.
And bears eat under the stairs, you know,
Yes, under the stairs they eat,
While waiting for a child to munch,
They help themselves to bugs for lunch,
Yes, under the stairs they eat.
The time they’re hungriest is 8,
So get to bed and don’t be late,
Don’t pass close by the cupboard door,
Small feet make treats for Baby Roar,
Yes, under the stairs they eat.
And bears jog under the stairs, you know,
Yes, under the stairs they jog,
It’s vital for their health, you see,
To be as fit as they can be,
(I think they’ve even got a Wii),
Yes, under the stairs they jog.
As soon as breakfast’s cleared away?
Bear-obics! Half an hour a day,
And then 10k – (and that’s for fun?
That’s more than even Dad can run!)
Yes, under the stairs they jog.
And bears sing under the stairs, you know,
Yes, under the stairs they sing,
I heard them once, quite late at night,
They got their harmonies just right,
Yes, under the stairs they sing.
From jazz to folk to opera,
I think they know the lot-tera,
The dad sings bass, the mum sings top,
The rest sing till they’re told to stop,
Yes, bears sing under the stairs.
And Bears sleep under the stairs, you know,
Yes, under the stairs they sleep,
So if you’re asked to tidy toys,
Or hang your coat, just don’t make noise,
‘Cause bears sleep under the stairs.
Take all the time you need and more,
Best wait until you hear them snore,
I’m told the best time’s nine fifteen,
Or ten – or sometime in between,
(And if you whistle you won’t be seen),
Yes, bears sleep under the stairs.
In every multi-storeyed home
Across the globe, Beware!
Under the stairs there surely lives
A family of bears.
Pssssst! Have you checked for bears today?
Just listen up! You’ll be okay!
Tip 1: First thing, turn on the light;
Tip 2: They don’t come out at night!
Tip 3: Don’t show them you’re afraid.
Tip 4: They’re fond of lemonade!
Now smile, relax, no need to run
‘Cause stairly bears are just for fun!